Jacob's Birth Story

Warning: I've edited my birth photos as much as it was possible. However, if you are not a "birth junkie" like me, you may still find them too graphic.

It has been 5 days since my son's birth & I am still processing all of the events that led up to his arrival. Jacob Samuel Hong was born at home on November 29th at 4:59 am at exactly 41 weeks of gestation. He weighed 8 lbs 5 oz & was 21.5" long.
I did a lot of preparation for my homebirth, but in the end all I needed were a pair of skilled hands & a towel. That's right, I didn't get to light the candles; listen to the labor music/hypnobirthing CDs I prepared especially for this occasion; fill the birthing tub; enjoy the aromatherapy; drink Laboraid & have labor snacks; videotape & photograph my birth & use the loving skills of my wonderful doula.


Shon inflating the birth tub on the evening prior to Jacob's birth


Loads of fun for the kids!

On the evening prior to Jacob's birth, I felt discouraged & depressed since I was going to be 41 weeks pregnant the next day. My midwife just sent me an email asking me to schedule an ultrasound since she felt my amniotic fluid levels were low. Even without an ultrasound I knew she was probably right since my abdomen measured small for my gestational age & every time I layed down I could easily palpate the baby - there was hardly any cushion around him. However, he kept up his usual strong & frequent kicks inside my belly, which was reassuring. I spent a couple of hours outdoors raking the leaves that afternoon & then cried for most of the evening. I was afraid of the ultrasound finding something wrong & then having to go to the hospital to be induced. Hello, the cascade of unwanted interventions. I truly felt desperate & like I was at the end of my rope.
Low & behold, I started to have mild cramps in my abdomen (didn't feel like contractions at all) at about 9 pm - about 1 every 30" that same evening. I suddenly got an urgent need to inflate the birth tub, which my husband did just prior to us going to bed. The kids had a blast playing inside it for about an hour. I tidied up the kitchen, vacuumed the carpet & straightened up the living room (to have the house as clean as possible, just in case). Sophia went to bed with Daddy while Gerritt & I stayed up reading books. We went to sleep at around 11 pm.
I fell asleep soundly & barely woke myself up due to pressure & uncomfortable feeling in my abdomen around 2:30 am. It felt like my bladder was full to the max & I needed to have a bowel movement. I really didn't want to get out of my warm bed so I stayed in bed until 3 am when I couldn't take it anymore. Getting out of bed was very uncomfortable - again, nothing that you would call contractions, but more of spasming cramps.
Even though it felt like my bladder was full, when I tried to urinate, only a trickle of fluid came. I panicked for a few seconds. The fact that I couldn't pee meant that the baby's head was so low in my pelvis, it was putting pressure on my bladder. I relaxed more & was finally able to fully empty my bladder. In the next 30" I had multiple loose bowel movements. I started to get excited since I knew the bowel emptying was one of the signs of my body preparing for labor.
I started to feel the contractions (still spaced out) while sitting on the toilet. I knew they had to pick up before I would wake up my midwife & doula. I walked to the living room & went online to figure out my contraction pattern using the Contraction Master. I timed exactly one contraction before I realized I couldn't comfortably stand there. Suddenly, my contractions became more intense, requiring me focusing & breathing through them. I put on my headphones to listen to my hypnobirthing CD.

"Look up at the ceiling & try to find a spot to stare at. Try not to blink.

On the count of 3 you'll close your eyes, & when you do I want you to feel that deep feeling of release & bring it all the way down & out through your toes. Ready?

Your eyelids are feeling very heavy now..."

With hypnobirthing failing to bring me any relief I realized I was far too advanced in my labor for the words to by useful. I took off the headphones & decided I needed to call someone on my labor team NOW.
With shaky hands, I dialed the phone number of my doula Patti Ramos at around 3:45 am telling her that my labor has begun. She responded warmly, "I've been expecting to hear from you." We both decided she should probably be at my house by 6 am & I would give her a call back if my labor picked up. Then I called my midwife's apprentice Kat to give her "heads up," so she could start getting ready. I knew I needed fluids & food to have the energy for the upcoming birth so I drank a large glass of water & put in a bowl of oatmeal in the microwave to be cooked. By then my contractions intensified even more so I called Patti back & told her to come in sooner than 6 am. She promised to be at my house within 1 hour. I also called my midwife Charlene who also said she would leave soon.
Then I remembered that my birth would be videotaped & photographed so I went back to the bathroom to put on a comfortable dress, fix my hair & apply makeup. Somewhere in between those activities, I felt a wet sensation in my underwear only to find that I had a bloody "show" (a sure sign of labor). I called Charlene again to relay this new finding to her & woke up my husband (around 4:15 am). With him busy filling the birth tub, I went back to the bathroom. While brushing my teeth I felt a strong urge to push. The contraction was so strong, I started to moan loudly, "Aaaaaaaaaaaah!" Once the contraction was over, I got on all fours when another urge to push came over me. "Aaaaaaaaaaaah!" Once the pushing sensation passed, I swore "S***!" By then my husband heard my moans & asked, "Baby, are you pushing?" I barely caught my breath to say, "Yes, I am."
It took everything I had to get out of the bathroom. I put a large towel on our living room rug & got on all fours again. It was around 4:45 am & I was actively pushing. My husband asked if he should call 911 (my midwife hasn't arrived yet) & I reassured him that we could handle it by ourselves.
Jacob's head was crowning & I felt like I was being split in two. The all too familiar "ring of fire" was burning my perineum. It took everything I had not to push the baby out right then. I panted & stayed still trying to slow things down. First, to give my tissues enough time to stretch to avoid a tear. Second, to buy my labor team more time. Jacob's body retreated back into my uterus, only for it to start the whole baby expulsion process again in about 2 minutes. His head crowned once more. I did more panting & relaxing as much as possible & miraculously was able to keep Jacob inside me for the 2nd time.

At that moment Kat walked in & quickly put on her gloves. I yelled at my husband, "Grab the camera!" Another strong urge to push took over & I didn't resist it this time. More burning ring of fire & then a sudden relief. I asked Kat if the baby's head was born & she affirmed it was.

Jacob's body easily slipped out just a couple of minutes later at 4:59 am. Kat caught the baby & handed him to me between my legs (I was standing on my knees by then). I put him on my chest & wrapped a blanket around him for warmth. My midwife Charlene walked in a few seconds later. She had a feeling my labor would progress really fast & called Kat while driving & told her to hurry.

The first look

Birth euphoria

I always thought I would cry when I met Jacob for the first time. I imagined the moment so many times & my eyes welled up with tears when I thought about looking into his precious face for the first time. But no tears came on Jacob's birth day. The speed, the suprise & the adrenalin rush of the preceeding 2 hours left me unable to process the magnitude of what just had happened. Thankfully, my body instinctively knew what to do, but my mind was still cathing up.

I studied Jacob's features overwhelmed by love for this tiny stranger familiar to me only through his kicks in my belly. Once the umbilical cord stopped pulsing, it was cut to allow me greater mobility. While cradling Jacob in my arms, I slowly moved closer to the couch. I laid down to rest & to await for the delivery of the placenta. My midwife chose active management of the 3rd stage of labor due to my history of low platelets, so I received an injection of oxytocin in my arm to contract my uterus & minimize any chance of post-partum hemorrhage. Sometime after my doula & her assistant have arrived.

My placenta didn't want to come out while I was laying down, so I got up & squatted next to the couch. The placenta came out a few minutes later with gentle traction on the umbilical cord, & Kat took it to the bathroom for a thorough exam. It was thin & "shreddy" in a few places so Jacob was definitely ready to be born.


I spent the new few hours resting & cuddling with Jacob on the couch. Because of the physiologic fluid shifting I was very thirsty & couldn't get enough of the coconut water. I drank 1 small container of it about every 20 minutes. I also got to finally eat my oatmeal!
My midwife & her apprentice examined my perineum - just one small tear on right vaginal wall (not big enough to require sutures). They also checked my vitals & the firmness of my uterine fundus. There were no antibiotic eye ointment or vitamin K shot for Jacob, & his newborn exam was conducted a couple of hours after his birth while I securely held him in my arms. He looked so helpless & small & I gave birth so easily, I estimated his weight to be around 7 lbs & was shocked to learn that he was over 8 lbs!
Our toy poodle Maxi became very protective of the baby & me. He didn't want to leave my side. His small furry body felt wonderfully warm next to me. However, he kept jumping on & nipping at anyone who tried to touch Jacob & I so after a while Shon locked him in the office. :-)


Sophia & Gerritt slept through the whole thing including my loud labor moans, my husband going in & out of Sophia's bedroom to fill the birth tub, dog barking & presence of so many people.
My nanny arrived at 8:30 am & happily learned that Jacob was born. She woke up & dressed Sophia & Gerritt. Usually the shy one, Sophia didn't show any fear of so many strangers being present in our living room. She walked up to me & smiled pointing at Jacob, "Baby is here!" Gerritt was more reserved & seemed overwhelmed. The plan was for Gerritt & Sophia to go to my friend's house for the rest of the day, but only Sophia agreed to go. Gerritt refused to leave my side so we just let him stay. To cheer him up, we encouraged him to get into my now filled with water birth tub. He really enjoyed swimming & playing in it. At noon he decided he wanted to join Sophia after all & my husband took him to my friend's house. My doula encouraged me to get into the birth tub with Jacob (she really wanted to photograph us in water), but fatigue got the best of me. I simply didn't want to get off the couch.
My midwife & her apprentice Kat left the house around 10 am. Kat took my refrigerated placenta with her to be encapsulated. My doula & her assistant stayed until about 11 am. They straightened up the house, took photos & made sure I was comfortable. My poor husband who took care of everyone else all morning hasn't had anything to eat or drink since I woke him up, so he finally had a snack.
So in a nutshell, this is my birth story. I am still feeling the birth "high," especially because I didn't just have a home birth, but a home VBAC (vaginal birth after Cesarean). This was also my 2nd VBAC. Although my home birth didn't go as planned, I am very satisfied with the outcome. Even though my hospital VBAC 2.5 years ago was also a success, nothing came even close to my experience of giving birth at home. This birth has been my best! Every woman deserves to have such an empowering & liberating birth experience whether she gives birth at home, at the birthing center or in the hospital.
I feel tremendous gratitude for my midwife. Although she didn't "catch" Jacob, the mere fact that she was willing to take on a home VBAC made this birth story possible. As I journied through this pregnancy & birth, I also have come to have a deeper appreciation of my husband. I love him even more for being so supportive as I pursued my dream birth even though he didn't agree with a home birth idea at first. Instead of trying to change my mind, he chose to trust my ability to make the best decision for me & our unborn child. A man who is pretty conventional in the way he lives his life came to accept his wife "going hippie" on him, complete with a home birth & eating her own placenta.
Welcome Earthside & happy birthday, my dear Jacob! I am so excited to be your Mommy!

"There is no other experience in life that can remotely compare to this ... when your newly born baby opens his or her eyes for the first time and then turns to look up into yours with an unconditional love that is purely indescribable. In that very instant, you learn the true meaning of vulnerability." -Patti Ramos