Sunday, August 14, 2011

Making It Through Pregnancy That's Not Your First


With the troublemakers (24.5 weeks along)

I took a long walk with the dogs yesterday & silently congratulated myself on making it this far in my pregnancy. It's not like I have a choice (once you sign up for this adventure, there is no turning back), but I felt proud of being able to take care of myself allowing me to feel relatively well. My thoughts slowly drifted back to my first pregnancy, when I had ample time to take unlimited naps & sleep in in the mornings, read pregnancy & birth-related books & shop for the baby items I thought I needed. Fast forward 4 years & now I am pregnant with my 3rd (gasp!) child. So how do I take care of myself & this unborn baby while juggling family, career & the needs of 2 toddlers?

1) Nutrition is of paramount importance. My daily protein intake goal is 80-100 grams & I include protein in every meal. Since I can't eat as much as I used to in one sitting, I eat all of my protein first, then vegetables, then everything else if I have any room left. To feel my best, I need to eat at least every 3 hours. Some of my favorite snacks are sliced apples/pears with a slice of full-fat cheese, peanuts, whole-wheat toast/English muffin with walnut butter & honey, low-fat cottage cheese with berries, & a couple of ground turkey patties with whole-wheat crackers. Make sure to feed yourself first thing in the morning before taking care of the kids or starting any chores.

2) Adequate rest is 2nd on my list. In my non-pregnant state, I usually need at least 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep per night. When pregnant, I feel much better after sleeping for 9. Thanks to cosleeping with Gerritt (he won't go to bed without me), I am in bed at 9:30 or 10 pm on most days of the week. Some days (like during the baby's growth spurts) I need more than 9 hours of sleep, so if it happened to be my day off, I nap with the kids.

3) I would not have the energy I have without regular aerobic exercise. Since we have 2 dogs that need regular walking, it also happened to be my favorite form of exercise. I must admit it's challenging to find time to exercise with my busy schedule, but one must make it a priority. I have exercised at 6 am while my husband was showering & getting ready for work, at my lunch hour & at 9 pm at night when it's dark outside because on some days those were the only times available. My goal is to walk briskly for at least 20 minutes at a time once or twice daily. I don't overexert myself, but strive to increase my heart rate & have mild perspiration by the end of my walks. Exercise is a great stress reliever & helps with pregnancy-related insomnia (you know the kind I am talking about - you can't get comfortable in any position). It's also a good way to clear your head. I often come up with really good ideas by the end of my walks.


A cup of tea - a nice way to take a break if you only have a few minutes to spare

4) It's wise not to overcommit to social engagements. Friends with older children or without children usually don't remember or understand how much energy growing a human being requires. No, I can't go out on Friday evening after working the previous 4 days or stay up past 10 pm, unless you are willing to come over & babysit the kids, feed them dinner, give them a bath & put all of the mess away to get ready for the next day, so I could still go to bed on time. Yes, it would be fun to go to yet another festival, but it would not hurt us to skip it this year. Not only will I not miss the crowds, but also all of the packing/unpacking required for such an outing to be successful (drinks, snacks, stroller, a change of clothes, diapers, wipes, favorite toys, etc.).

5) Break big housework projects into smaller ones. With every pregnancy the list of things I want to accomplish before the baby comes is a mile long. I usually don't like to leave a project unfinished once I start it, but being pregnant requires a different approach. For example, I have a huge pile of clothes for ironing, but some days I can only iron 5 shirts. Also, I can't spend 2 hours on gardening, & doing it for only 30" is OK. Maybe I can organize only 1 closet every couple of days instead of doing them all in one day. The work still gets done & I don't exhaust myself doing it.

6) Next, having time to yourself can't be overrated. Some people get more energetic the more people they have around them. It's the opposite for me. Having a few hours to myself a couple of times a week, when I am not constantly touched or have my name called every 20 minutes to solve various problems, makes me a happier person & mother. My husband has been instrumental in this initiative, taking both of the kids to his Mom's house for the day or with an overnight trip once every couple of weeks. Also, I recently found a wonderful Russian nanny my kids adore not far from our house & drop them off at her place for 4-hour blocks when I need a break (our regular nanny prefers to work full days). I don't really have "Mommy guilt" since the nanny takes them to the park as well as does various fun projects. For example, Gerritt came home last week knowing how to add simple numbers (!).

7) Teach your older kids to be self-sufficient. Encourage them to do as much for themselves as developmentally possible. For example, Gerritt can pick out his own clothes & dress himself in the morning, put Sophia's dirty diaper in the trash & clean up toys.

8) Last, but not least, letting go of my perfectionist attitude has been helpful. It's OK if the kids eat pizza for dinner instead of a homemade meal once a week. Also, bathing them once every 3-4 days instead of daily is OK too.

Everyone has to work together for the good of the family. The goal is to have a healthy mother & a healthy full-term baby. It is worth it in the long haul.

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